Speakers and storytellers can learn a
LOT from the TV series, “Breaking Bad.” The show had what
most Toastmasters, speakers, and comics don’t have when they
tell a story: a character with desire.
(The last episode aired this past
week, but, if you’re not caught up on it yet, don’t worry: there
are no spoilers in this blog – so keep reading.)
What fueled the show through five
brilliant seasons with meth-like energy was the driving desire of the
lead character, Walter White, played by Bryan Cranston.
On the surface, the show is about a
chemistry teacher who gets cancer and becomes a meth dealer because,
as he says, “I want to provide for my family.”
However, we the audience learn what
really is the driving force in White’s psyche: his
narcissistic desire for power, money, and respect. And, in a way,
what we learn about Walter is to some degree true for many people:
their public presentation of what they want in life – and most
importantly why they want it -- is far from the truth. And
often, those very desires can drive someone to ruin.
This very basic element -- the hero’s
desire -- is what is lacking in 90% of the stories I hear from
speakers. Most of the stories I’m given to work with are just a
list of things that happened to the story teller, with them bouncing
like a pinball off the flappers of life that throw them in all sorts
of directions: getting ill, finding true love, going skydiving, and
so on. “This happened… then this happened… then this
happened…”
When I hear this pattern, I always ask
this question: “What is it that you, the
main character, want in the story?”
They look at me via Skype with blank
eyes, saying: “I don't know.”
If you’re going to speak, you need to
get that you are not a passive victim of life. Your desires
are creating your life. And, you can’t be a speaker unless
you can be responsible for the forward nature of your life because of
those desires. When we stand up in front of others, we have a
responsibility of consciousness. When we give advice to other people,
we have a responsibility to have done considerable work on ourselves
-- and are able to come forward directly and honestly by admitting
what we want or wanted in all the stories of our life.
Most speakers think that their
signature story begins with not just a large event -- but a large
life–changing event. But, I find the best
stories start way before that dramatic event. It's much more
compelling to describe a triumphant moment in your life -- such as
getting on in front of people and speaking, or facing something that
terrifies you -- when you can frame your story so that the audience
knows your past, your challenges -- and most importantly -- what
drives you.
On a personal note, the events that
drive me started in childhood. My desire to become a comic and
later, a professional speaker, was guided by the first 15 years of my
life, when I was frequently laughed at not because of my sense
of humor – but because of my speech impediment. I didn’t want
people to stop laughing: I just wanted them to laugh for the
right reason.
What is it that you want -- and
why?
It’s much more powerful to share how
you had to stand up to your doctors during a life threatening illness
when you reveal that you had been unable to stand up to your husband,
or even to stand up to anyone to take care of your own
needs.
It means so much more to take a huge
risk and do something dangerous where you plunge into the unknown …
when your audience knows that all your life you've been committed to
security and being safe.
So much of the pain and suffering of
Walter White in Breaking Bad was not the lies he told others
-- but the lies he told himself. Without revealing any details of
the finale -- let’s just say he finally got honest.
Let's get honest in each story you
tell: what did you really want?
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